Twa Buzzards

Two buzzards are arguing over a meal.

"I was here first," says the first buzzard.

"That may be, Rick," says the second, "but you've been gorging for long enough now, and you've made a right mess of it. It's time for a new beak."

"Oh, really?" retorts Rick. "And just where have you been these past few years, Kay? Gallivanting off to foreign parts, I heard. This here is Texas carrion for Texas buzzards. We don't want any of your funny outside ideas here."

"Oh? And who's this 'we' you're squawkin' about, anyway?" snaps Kay. "I don't see any 'we.' Just you. And I'm every bit as Texan as you, and then some."

"Well, we'll just see about that!" says Rick. "This is my carrion, and you can't have any!"

"Now, you're being childish," says Kay.

"Am not!" says Rick.

"Are, too!" says Kay.

"Now, wait just one cotton-pickin' minute!" says the carrion, which is a small skunk. "Don't I get any say here?"

"Certainly not!" shouts Rick. "You just shut up and be dead!"

"But I'm not dead," says the skunk. "There are rules ..."

"You stay out of this, stinky boy!" warns Kay. "This is between us buzzards!"

"I was a bit indisposed there for a moment," objects the skunk, "but I'm feeling a lot better now. I'll just mosey along, if it's all the same to you."

"It is not all the same to us!" squawks Rick severely. "And it ain't up to you!"

"I rather think it is," says the skunk.

"Nope!" retorts Kay. "In these parts, you got two choices: him or me. That's it."

"And really," Rick interjects, "that comes down to just one choice, which is me."

"The heck, you say!" counters Kay.

"You bet, I do!" retorts Rick. "That's my carrion!"

"Over my plucked body!" snaps Kay. "It's my carrion!"

"No way!" insists Rick.

"Say," says Kay, "where did it go?"