Special to the Daily Dishrag - A highly sophisticated Chinese spy plane made an emergency landing in Poughkeepsie, NY yesterday.  The aircraft had been damaged by harassing F-16 interceptors, one of which clipped the wing of the Chinese craft.  The American fighter crashed.  The pilot is missing and presumed dead.  Chinese sources reported that U.S. interceptors routinely harass their spy planes, some coming as close as 50 feet.

President Bush acted swiftly to limit damage in what could be a serious international incident.  The Daily Dishrag was able to obtain this exclusive interview with the President.

DD:     Mr. President, what actions did you take to contain this crisis?
GWB:  Well, I was just in time to prevent our overzealous intelligence officers from entering the airplane and interrogating the crew.  Of course, we will return them immediately.
DD:     Why, Mr. President?  Didn't the aircraft violate American air space?
GWB:  Only by accident.  Our own fighters forced it off course.
DD:     But wouldn't it benefit this country to examine their reconnaissance equipment?
GWB:  Sure, but we cannot enter an aircraft that has not willfully violated our air space.  International law is very clear on this point.
DD:     But doesn't it bother you that the Chinese keep sending these airplanes over to spy on us?
GWB:  Oh, no.  We never get excited about Chinese spying.  Mr. Wen Ho Lee can vouch for that.
DD:     How about the pilot we lost?  Doesn't that make you angry?
GWB:  Of course not!  Gee, it's too bad, but he brought it on himself.  Can't blame the Chinese for that.
DD:     Mr. President, why Poughkeepsie?
GWB:  Pa-what?