Recent Events Explained

"Liver?"

"Check!"

"Kidneys?"

"Check!"

"Pancreas?"

"Check!"

"Heart?"

"Check!"

"Well, that just about does it. Oh, yes. Brain?"

"Um."

"What, exactly, do you mean, 'um?'"

"I mean, um, ... check. Sort of, Lord."

"How can it be 'sort of,' Gabe? Is that chanting I hear?"

"Well, we did pass out the brains, Lord," stammered Gabriel nervously, "only, ... we appear to have some leftovers."

"Leftovers?" asked God, cocking a divine eyebrow. "But I whupped up the exact, correct number of brains. I'm sure of that. I'm sure of everything."

"Well, um, yes, you did, Lord," squirmed Gabriel. "Right, as usual. But you see, not everyone claimed theirs. In fact, about a third of the group walked out abruptly, just as I was passing them out."

"Hmm," mused God suspiciously. "And the chanting?"

"Yes," mumbled Gabriel, "that's them."

"'Hands off our heads,' is it?"

"Yes, Lord. Also, 'Hear our voice.'"

"Ok, where's Lucifer?" asked God.

"Right here!" piped Lucifer. "Just enjoying the show."

"Which you had nothing to do with, I suppose?"

"Oh, just a bit of fun," Lucifer admitted. "You know how I like a good joke."

"Yes?" urged God, leaving a silence for the angel to fill.

Lucifer giggled. "I just said, 'See that guy over there? He's going to make you have a brain.' And they just stormed out on their own, chanting slogans."

"What now?" asked God with a touch of exasperation. "Are they crying?"

"Yes, Lord," replied Lucifer. "And screaming, 'We want our world back.'"

"They've never lived in a different world," observed God. "I should know. I just made this one. What world are they talking about?"

"Apparently, one where no one is trying to give them a brain," said Lucifer.

The lilting strains of "Keep out of our cranial cavities!" drifted across the tranquil scene.

"But," objected the Creator, "a brain is necessary to live and function in the world I designed."

Lucifer shrugged. "Apparently not."