Killers

There was another instance just yesterday. Mrs. O'Leary found a huge colony in her back yard. So the exterminators came out and took care of it, of course, because the things are so aggressive. Fortunately, no one was hurt, but you can't just leave them out there, and you can't relocate them, even to a remote area. Because then they would just keep on breeding and spreading. Still, it seems a shame just to exterminate the lot. That's why I had this idea.

I started thinking about this long before Mrs. O'Leary's mega-colony came to light. In fact, it's a shame those little buggers didn't choose my property for their housing project. Some of their brethren did, however. Months ago. They started building right under my mailbox. Well, I knew right away that they were the killer variety, and I was ready for them. Some say the little beasts are an escaped lab experiment, and I am in no position to say them nay. Be that as it may, they are just as susceptible to gas as their inoffensive cousins, and I had all the equipment at the ready.

So I knocked them out, repackaged them, and ... here's the genius variation ... shot them off on a rocket of my own design to a distant planet I had located. Lucky for them they found an astronomer, huh? I figured, why not give them a chance, at least, to flourish somewhere outside the reach of civilization, where they can't bother anyone?

Oh, that planet. Little blue-green thing, third out from a star called Sol in the outer spiral arm of the galaxy. Seems to have a lot of potential to support life. I think the little bastards deserve a chance. They'll probably kill any other life form that may evolve on that planet, and when they're done with that, kill each other off. But that's not my look-out, is it?