Suspending Parliament
copyright © 2019 by Robert L. Blau

Her Majesty the Queen has granted Prime Minister Boris Johnson's request to suspend parliament.  Then, finding that she liked the power rush, she rescinded the Magna Carta and remanded Johnson to the Tower of London, pending beheading.

In additon, Her Majesty has reasserted Crown ownership of all lands in the United Kingdom.  By further order of the Queen, the Crown lands will be divided into fiefs, which, at the will of the Crown, will be bestowed upon loyal and deserving lords. The lords may further subdivide their fiefs among vassals, as appropriate.  All those complicated and expensive courts and police forces are hereby abolished, as the lords will take care of all that kind of thing.

In further developments, Her Majesty has ordered the British armed forces to restore order in the colonies, starting with the so-called "United States of America."  The current "President" of the American colonies is to be sent back to Germany, along with all his Hunnish brethren.  It is well known that Germany did not send its best people to the American colonies.  They sent people with lots of problems.  Criminals.  Rapists.  You know the bit.