The Serpent in the Garden

The way it really went, you see ...

Well, in the beginning, as you know, God created the heavens and the earth. And all that. And last, He created Adam and Eve.

And God said to Adam and Eve, "Look, I made this great garden. I call it the Garden of Eden. I want you to live in it. Great accommodations, all the food you could want, temperature controlled."

"That sounds great," said Adam.

"But very expensive," said Eve, who was the practical one. "What do you want from us in return?"

'"Absolutely nothing," replied God. "Simply enjoy my creation. It's all on me. Rent-free, free board. You might call this the Intention of the Founding Father."

"Great," said Adam and Eve together. "When can we move in?"

"Immediately," said God. "Er, almost immediately. There's just one formality I have to take care of first. There're a lot of other creatures in the Garden, too, and I don't want to be a despot, so I want to ask their permission, first."

Almost all of the denizens of the Garden of Eden voted to admit.

But there was one.

There lived in the Garden the Great Chinned Serpent. The Great Chinned Serpent demurred.

"You can't just let any deadbeat into the Garden," objected the Great Chinned Serpent. "They have to prove themselves worthy. You need to have a work requirement. I just discovered some black rocks that I think could make me richer than ... some really rich guy. Maybe we could make these losers mine my black rocks. How about that?"

The Great Chinned Serpent never could be persuaded, so Adam and Eve and their descendants have been denied entry to the Garden to this very day.