copyright © 2025 by Robert L. Blau
Three hundred fifty billion.
That was all. Lon had counted every dollar, over and over.
Pinched, squeezed, and caressed, over and over.
And Christmas was coming. Christmas and the election.
Lon and Don were Bros, the ultimate relationship between manly men.Lon
and Don each had one thing of which he was immensely proud. For
Lon, it was his obscene wealth. For Don, it was his obscene ego.
Neither could bear to part with, taint, or diminish his signature
possession.
But Christmas was coming. And the Election. What was a Bro to do?
Lon went to Don's campaign headquarters. On the door was a sign:
"We buy elections." Lon went to the campaign manager.
"Will you buy an election for me?" asked Lon.
"I buy elections," said the campaign manager, "Whattaya got?"
Later that day, Lon went to Don and said, "I got you an early Christmas present."
"Oh, yeah?" replied Don. "What is it?"
"I just dropped 10% of my fortune to buy you an election!" beamed Lon.
"Hey, super!" grinned Don. "Know what? I've decided to curb my ego
enough to let you have a slice of my spotlight! Now all the fake
news media can rag on you for a couple of months!"
"Very cool!" kvelled Lon. "You know, the MAGAi were the wise men who
invented oligarchy, plutocracy, and authoritarianism! We're just
like the MAGAi ... No, we are the MAGAi!"
"And oh, yeah, ... yer gettin' a few bill' in government contracts."