The GFMA Replaces the ACA

At long last, "Obamacare," aka the ACA, has been repealed and replaced by a genius Republican health care law, the GMFA.

The catastrophic deficiencies of Obamacare have been too widely contrived and marketed to require repetition here, so it behooves us merely to explain the manifold benefits of the GFMA. This legislation answers every objection ever raised against any previous GOP health care reform effort. Against, in fact, any previous health care reform effort of any kind. This is universal health care writ large!

Just get this:

1. One hundred percent eligibility. That's 100%! That's right. Every American man, woman, and child is eligible. Every single one. And every married one.
2. No pre-existing condition exclusion. Right again! No one is excluded by any pre-existing condition whatsoever.
3. No co-pays.
4. No coinsurance. You are not responsible for paying a single penny of the cost of care.
5. No taxes to pay for your health insurance. Let me repeat that: You will not be taxed for health insurance. Not for your own insurance, not for anyone else's.
6. No complicated rules or regulations. No difficult legalese requiring lawyers to interpret. Simple and straightforward, same for everyone.

So here it is, the bill in its entirety, except for the part that repeals that awful Obamacare:

"If you get sick or injured, go get you a GoFundMe page."

That is the GoFundMe Act. We look forward to expanding the concept to cover other areas, such as agriculture, education, energy, and national defense.