"A well functioning
Transportation System, being necessary to the economy of a free State,
the right of the people to keep and drive Vehicles shall not be
infringed."
"'Nother huge pile-up on I-35
this morning, Dad."
"Oh, really, Honey? Know what happened?"
"Yeah. M1 Abrams ran amok. Fourteen dead, dozens injured.
They said on the news that traffic accidents are the leading
cause of death for children and teens."
"Tsk, tsk. Thoughts and prayers, eh? Thoughts and prayers."
"Um, Dad? Why can someone drive a weapon of war on the public
highways? Why can someone even own an
effin' tank? Pardon my
French."
"Why, Second Amendment, Erin, Second Amendment! Founding Fathers'
legacy to us!"
"But isn't that just about being able to get to work and transport
goods and stuff? They didn't have
tanks 200 years ago! The Founding Fathers wouldn't have known
what a tank was."
"Don't matter." Dad tapped the side of his nose knowingly. "It's
a vehicle. That's what
the Constitution says.
'Sides, you don't know what
the Fathers knew!" Nose tap again.
"I don't understand," Erin pouted. "We don't let people walk around
with assault rifles. How come they can have tanks?"
"Well, weapons, of course,
are a different matter. You gotta regulate dangerous weapons.
Vehicles are more of a
... conveyance, see?"
"Yeah, about regulation, Dad.
We could have laws ... common-sense laws ... to prevent, well, bad
drivers from driving! Maybe, have licenses to drive! And you'd
have to take a test before you got a license. To prove you were a
good driver. And you couldn't drive if you were drunk! And
you'd have to be old enough
... say, 16! And we could have ... speed limits! And ..."
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, there, young lady! That there's libtard talk! They say 'common sense.' I say 'slippery slope!' Mighty slippery slope! First,
it's a 'speed limit.' Next thing you know, they're taking away
our cars!"
"Do I have to go to school today, Dad? I feel sick."
'''Fraid so, young lady! I'll just start up the Abrams.
It's barely scratched."